Unity in Diversity

What is unity in diversity in India?

In India, there are people of different caste, creed and religion. But the beauty is that people of different religion have one common feeling, and that common feeling is:

"Our religion is the most neglected religion in this country"

Election Special

Strangely, the only eligibility criteria for people to vote is age.

So, anybody who is 18 years of age and has no idea who is what in India can go ahead and change the future of India.

Just listing down the different thought processes of people while voting:

1) I have no idea of the candidates in my constituency. But since I am a responsible citizen of India, I will go ahead and vote for some random guy.

2) I will vote for a corrupt person in my constituency since I like the PM candidate of the corrupt guy party.

3) What will people think If I dont vote.

4) What will people think If I dont vote for Modi.

5) I saw an ad on the newspaper front page. Hence voting for that party.

6) My family is a loyal voter of this party. Hence, I will also vote for this party. Who cares for the candidates and other details.

7) I have been voting for the same party all these years. Hence, will vote for change and see if something changes.

8) I like a candidate's profile and think he's a good guy, but will still vote for the corrupt guy as I know that the good guy will anyway lose. Why should I waste my vote?

9) My friend shared a link on FB about a party - hence will vote for that party.

10) I saw some negative news about a party on a news channel. Hence, will vote for its rival party.

11) This guy has a lot of assets. Will vote for a poor guy.

12) This guy has a lot of assets. Will vote for him as he already has a lot of money.

13) Will vote for my caste guy. Let him at least make some money.

14) Will vote for whom my husband / father asks me to vote for.

15) This party workers helped me find my voting serial number. Hence, will vote for them.

16) All are thieves. But still will vote for one of the thieves.

17) I want to post a selfie with my inked finger on FB. Hence voting for some random party.

Hopefully EC introduces a new button "IHNI" for "I Have No Idea" just like the NOTA button.

Please add more such thoughts ;)

Ghost logic in movies

I'm sure even the real ghosts will be having a nice laughing time watching the horror movies, and the logic used in them.

Some of my observations are as follows:

The ghosts are usually waiting in a haunted house for a new owner with his family to arrive. The only mistake of the new owner is buying the house by paying a big amount.The ghost's ego gets hurt saying - "How dare you buy my house? Now get ready to die"

By the way, the ghost does not harm the "care-taker" of the house typically with a lantern, until the new family arrives.

However, after the family arrives, the ghost decides to turn off the lantern and the care-taker's role.

The ghost does not kill all the family at once, simply because its boring. It wants to have fun and hence only scares the wife until the interval by making a few noises here and there.

The ghost usually can appear from nowhere, but if its chasing the hero/heroine and they close the door, it can not enter the room.

The ghost is usually powerful, but in case the target even has small souvenirs like key chain or a pendant of cross with Jesus or Om, the ghost falls weak and can do no harm to the target. So a great take away for the audience - "Its always handy to carry such souvenirs, just in case".

Old saying "God only helps those who help themselves"
New saying "God only helps those who buy souvenirs"

The ghost also likes to fool people by getting into the body of any human being, and also behave like that person. After having some fun fooling people, the ghost decides to reveal its identity by changing the eye ball color of the person to red or blue.

Its not possible to "kill" the ghost because its already dead. But there is a way to finish the ghost by reading aloud from the Bible or putting colored powder in fire.

Gaane se inspiration

Of late, all movie and TV show titles are nothing but songs from old movies, for example "Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na, Bade Acche Lagte Hain, Dilwale Dulhania Le Jaayenge, Kabhie Khushi Kahie Gham".


But, there is one movie whose story is inspired from an old movie song. Yes - and the movie name is GHAJINI which is inspired from this song from the 1992 movie Sapne Saajan Ke:

Mere Pyaar Mein Mere Intezaar Mein
Sach Sach Kaho Tumane Kya Kiya
Kabhi Bhoola Kabhi Yaad Kiya

Kabhi Bhoola Kabhi Yaad Kiya

Kabhi Bhoola Kabhi Yaad Kiya

Kabhi Bhoola Kabhi Yaad Kiya   

Questions and obvious answers

I like to write the Q & A kind of blog posts, so here we go again:



Q. If a batsman hits the ball high and hard in the air and when the ball is in the air, he loses the grip of the handle off one hand, and the ball goes for a six, how should the commentator describe the shot?

A. Wowwwwwww.. what a hit! That was a six off "one" hand !!! Unbelievable !!!!




Q. If an actor acts in movies for 10 years, and then disappears for the next 30 years, and then acts in a comeback movie, how should one describe this actor in an Awards function?

A. This great actor has been working in movies for more than 40 years (***applause... applause***)



Q. When a KBC contestant uses the "double dip" life line, and after he tells his first answer, when Big B says if you had told some other answer, you would be wrong, what should the contestant say?

A. Sir, please don't scare me. Please tell the answer.

Q. When the "recorded live" grand finale of Indian Idol (whose promos have been coming the whole week) is being aired on TV, and the anchor says there is one hour left to vote for your favorite contestant, what should the TV audience do?

A. Send SMS like crazy to the contestant of their respective cities / states

Q. When Sachin, looking for his 100th 100, plays a lot of dot balls in the batting power play Vs Bangladesh and suddenly slogs like crazy after getting his 100, what does it mean?

A. He was not even thinking of the milestone while batting. The Bangladeshi bowlers were unplayable in the batting power play

Q. How can you change the world?

A. By casting your vote in elections


Q. Why do people participate in Elections?

A. To serve people.

Q. When India loses a cricket match, what should the ex-cricketers do?

A. Come on news channels, and analyze why India lost, and tell to the viewers what India could have done to win the match

Q. If a minnow team upsets a big team in a cricket match, what does that mean?

A. The match was fixed

Q. If a cricket match ends in a tie, what does it mean?

A. The match was fixed

Q. If the fielding team appeals for a run out and the umpires declare the batsman out, and the fielding team recalls the batsman, what is it called?

A. The spirit of the game, which could not have prevailed if the fielding team had not appealed in the first place.

Q. How does one feel after drinking Thums Up?

A. He / She feels like jumping from one building to another, and say to self - "Let me do something adventurous"

Destiny

Destiny - such a simple word. And the funda of destiny is also pretty simple - "Anything and everything that happens and does not happen is destiny".

Sachin does not get his 100th 100 - he was destined to get out
Dev saab dies - It was written for the world to lose its evergreen hero
Chicken crosses the road - It was written

So, basically - if it happens it was written to happen and if it does not happen, it was written not to happen.

If you like challenges, try to change your destiny, and tell me if you win. You can never do - because if you try to change your destiny, even that was written.

Everything is written. Me writing this stupid blog post about destiny (sorry - I had to write it as it was written), you reading it, and the rest of the world did not read this because it was written that they would never read it, everything! Even this.... even this speling miskate... this "word", this... and this... and that ... and this!

Because it was written to end my post here, I bow down to my destiny and end it right here!


Gotcha ;)

The end is near !!

I was about to hit a dog when I was riding my 2-wheeler on the road today. The dog was trying to cross the road without watching out for the vehicles on the road.

What a kalyug this is - The dogs have started to behave like humans. Is this the beginning of the end of the world?

Pizza Vs Ambulance

When somebody says, "In our country, Pizza takes less than 30 mins to come, but Ambulance does not come even after 2 hours", you will find people applauding at the statement. A few people may even have tears in their eyes.

But the reason why Pizza comes before Ambulance is that Pizza is delivered in a two-wheeler. The guy can ride on footpaths, broken roads, blocked roads, and reach the destination. Ambulance cant do that. Ambulance can help the vehicles behind it to scrape through the red-light along with it.

Rajini - The Rajini !

Here is my contribution to the world of Rajini jokes:

Rajini can become nostalgic about his future!

The pendulum stopped .......... Rajini hypnotized it!

Batting team needs 63 runs to win off one ball. The bowler bowls a legal delivery (not a wide, not a no-ball), but still the batting team wins. How?

Answer: The batsman's name was Rajinikanth.

Rajini can make ghosts confess that they actually don't exist!

The fathers of churches go to Rajini's house for their confessions.

"The time is 6:30" replied a deaf and dumb person, when Rajini asked him what time it was.

Rajinikanth can drive at 100 kmph in Bommanahalli at peak hours.

India wins !!!

A new India was born on 30th of September, 2010 at around 4 PM, when the Ayodhya verdict was given.



It's proved that everyone in India is treated equally, and hence equal division of land. I'm so glad that one party did not get 2/5th of the land, and the other 1/5th, or something like that.

After Uma Bharathi, probably, I'm the happiest person on this Earth today. India has raised one level up on the World map after yesterday's verdict.

I'm proud to be an Indian, and hope the Supreme court makes my great grand children proud!!

Ayodhya Verdict

Temple?
Mosque?
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.
.
.
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Mayawati Statue !!!

Interview

I took an online interview and here are the questions and my answers:




Question: how many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Answer: as many people needed to water 5 trees in 6 days




Question: If you look at the color blue, what does it make you think of?

Answer: blue apples



Question: What is the meaning of life?

Answer: A state in which people assume that they are alive




Question: Do you like thunderstorms?

Answer: Sure. How many?


Question: what do you think they eat in heaven?

Answer: Dum Biriyani




Question: Do you drink coffee?

Answer: No, I eat coffee




Question: Do you believe in ghosts?

Answer: Only if they believe in me!




Question: What do you do on fridays?

Answer: Go to office




Question: If you could have one super human power what would you choose?

Answer: Have human qualities




Question: Do you read harry potter books?

Answer: No, I burn them!




Question: Kill the spider or let it out?

Answer: make it bite me, so that I become Spiderman




Question: Do you eat cold cereal at night?

Answer: No, I sleep at night!




Question: Define yourself in 3 words...

Answer: This is me




Question: Would you rather be blind or deaf?

Answer: Anything, but dumb!




Question: Favorite fruit?

Answer: success




Question: What was your last thought?

Answer: What was my last thought?




Question: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer: Why not?




Question: What are some of your favorite Disney Films?

Answer: Chandni Chowk to China, Delhi 6, Tashan



Question: Opera, Musical, Concert, Play, Performance, or Other?

Answer: Other




Question: Favorite Place to Eat?

Answer: Dining Table




Question: Water or 100% Juice?

Answer: 13.75% water



Question: Do you have any tattoos, and if so what and where?

Answer: No, none and nowhere




Question: Where do you see yourself in five years?

Answer: in the mirror




Question: What 3 words would your best friend use to describe you?

Answer: He is ok




Question: If you had only six months to live, what would you do first?

Answer: Breathe




Question: What do you do for fun?

Answer: say truth




Question: Who was your hero as a child?

Answer: The baby in "baby's day out!"




Question: Do you believe that the cup is half empty or half full?

Answer: Fully empty after i finish the coffee




Question: If you won the lottery, how would you spend your millions?

Answer: paying taxes




Question: If you were an animal in the wild, what would you be?

Answer: Pritam, the music "composer"




Question: What makes you laugh?

Answer: Seriousness




Question: What makes you cry?

Answer: perpetual laughter




Question: If you have friends coming for supper what would you cook?

Answer: stories




Question: If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?

Answer: vaccuum




Question: If you could be successful at any job in the world, what would that job be?

Answer: Serial Killer




Question: Describe your perfect Sunday morning?

Answer: Sun rises, and I wake up!




Question: Close your eyes for a moment, who pops into your head?

Answer: Popeye the sailor man




Question: How many hobbies do you have

Answer: 334




Question: What attracts you most?

Answer: Earth




Question: do you plan in advance

Answer: No, I plan in retrospection!




Question: beach or mountain?

Answer: Beach on top of a mountain!




Question: How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

Answer: as much as it wants to




Question: Do you believe a good life is attainable? or is it something that is out of our control ie subject to luck etc.

Answer: Its definitely attainable, if you are lucky!




Question: Whats your favorite sport?

Answer: Going to office in the local bus




Question: What language would you like to speak fluently?

Answer: yabbybookeyis



Question: Whats the First Thing You Notice In A Boy/Girl?

Answer: If he/she has more than one nose and less than 2 ears, and more than 3 eyes




Question: Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt?

Answer: Tom & Jerry



Question: What is your natural hair color?

Answer: florescent green




Question: What is the name of your truest friend???

Answer: Dablu Liar




Question: What sort of character would you play in a comic book (hero, humorous sidekick, villian, that abrasive newspaper guy, etc.)

Answer: humurous villain




Question: What colour are your eyes?

Answer: Dark White




Question: Do you believe in heaven and hell?

Answer: I believe in the country's law




Question: if you were one of the seven dwarfs, who would you be?

Answer: The 5th one from the right




Question: What kind of car do you drive?

Answer: one with 4 wheels




Question: If you could pick anyone dead or alive to have lunch with, who would it be?

Answer: Mahatma Gandhi ji to Hyderabadi Biryani


Question: What would you do if this interview is never ending?

Answer: Ignore this question

Selflessness

"Selflessness" - This word should be removed from the dictionary, or atleast its meaning has to be modified as "non-existing".

Selfishness is an inherent property of a human being. I was having the "selfish-selfless" discussion with a friend of mine, when he said "Many people do social service. They are selfless people". I said, "Those people are getting happiness by doing social work. Helping others is actually increasing their own happiness. So, they are the most selfish people."

If you dont believe me, just ask any person who cares for others, and who helps others, if he/she is not doing it happily.

People who come close to be called as "selfless" are those who help others and dont feel happy about it. Because they are going against their own happiness, which is the toughest thing to do for any human being.

What say?

By the way, a happy new year!

When in Bommanahalli, be a Bommanahallian!

The following are a few questions and answers about Bommanahalli:











Q. Where can you find autos in Bommanahalli?



A. Everywhere.



Q. How can you find out if an outside auto is running on Bommanahalli roads?
A. It would have a meter.



Q. What is the capacity of a typical Bommanahalli auto?
A. 5 + 3 + 1

Q. What is the age of the youngest auto driver in Bommanahalli?

A. 9 years

Q. Which is the biggest bus stop in the world? Mention its dimensions.
A. The Bommanahalli Bus Stop. It is situated along the barricades separating the Hosur main road and the service road. It is 300 meters long and half as wide as hosur main road.


Q. If you want to go in the wrong way in Bommanahalli, who should you ask for help?
A. Traffic police.

Q. Ramu was walking on the footpath in Bommanahalli.
What is wrong with the above sentence?
A. Bommanahalli does not have footpaths.

Q. Trying to catch a running bus Ramu fell into the open drain in Bommanahalli.
What is wrong with the above sentence?
A. There is a punctuation mistake. There should be a comma(,) after bus.

Q. Name a few funny sign boards in Bommanahalli.
A. "No Parking", "No Right Turn", "Auto rickshaw nildaanavalla"

Q. What is the formula to calculate the number of vegetable vendors on a Bommanahalli road?
Illustrate with an example.
A. V = (Rl / Vl) * 2
where V = no. of vegetable vendor bandis.
Rl = length of the road in meters.
Vl = length of the vegetable bandi in meters.
Eg: The length of Kodichikkanahalli cross road is 100 m, and each vegetable bandi is 2m long.
So, No. of vegetable bandis, V = (100/2)*2 = 100
*2 is because there are 2 sides for a road.

Q. Where should you go in Bommanahalli, if you want to buy a SIM card? What documents do you need to get the SIM card there?

A. On the begur road, search for an umbrella. Just below the umbrella, you can find a person selling SIM cards at whole sale rates.
You dont need to submit any papers, other than the green ones with Bapu's photo.

Q. Where can you buy the latest blockbuster movie DVDs in Bommanahalli?
A. Opposite to Ganesha temple, there is a display of all languages movie DVDs. You will be able to find 3 in one, 4 in one, 5 in one, 10 in one movie DVDs there, at competitive prices.

Q. Which historical monument can you find in Bommanahalli?
A. The BBMP Office. You can get almost anything done from here by paying bribe. Sometimes, there are offers where the official fee is waived off.

Q. What are the various uses of Bommanahalli roads?
A. i) The shops can encroach upon the road, and the shop owners may place their boards, shop items on the road. They can assume that the road belongs to their shop, as part of super built-up area.
ii) The road can serve as the base to hold huge banners of our beloved politicians.
iii) The roads serve as parking places for the idle tempos, vans and lorries.
iv) The roads act as virtual shops for all the roadside vendors.
v) People may setup a stage on the roads, to celebrate festivals.
vi) The roads serve as walking paths for the pedestrains.
vii) People may treat the road as a garbage bin.
viii) The roads can also be used for vehicular movement.

Q. Describe the festive mood in Bommanahalli during Ganesha festival.
A. Ganesha Festival is celebrated very grandly in Bommanahalli. The streets will be lit up with thousands of 240 W bulbs on either sides of the road, the power supply drawn directly from the electrical lines. Several lanes would be blocked because of the pendal being setup. The loud speakers would be beautifully installed on many of the electric poles, and songs such as Babuji zara dheere chalo, chitranna chitranna, haley paatre haley kapada would be played all night so that Lord Ganesha - the God of Knowledge, blesses all the school kids to get good marks in the exams. This will continue till the visarjana.
During the Ganesha visarjana, all the shed hudugaru will be in full josh, playing colors and abusing people walking on the road.

Villu

Here is the story of the Tamil movie, Villu, starring Vijay (as told by a friend):

Vijay’s dad was killed by the villain, and his mother needs an operation! So he sells his land for his mother ! In order to take revenge, Vijay (Villu) has to go to America to kill the villain, but he has no money, no passport and no visa! So he decides one thing and comes to Chennai ! In Chennai, Villu climbs on top of LIC Building , gets blessings from Godess Kuruvi, and jumps from the top floor!!! But our Villu stays in air itself in same position! After 12 hrs, the earth rotates and since he is still in the same position, he jumps and lands in America ! He kills the villain and returns to Chennai the same way!!!!

Thank God, Rajinikanth was not the hero of this movie. If he was, he would have made Earth rotate backwards and go in the past, and kill the villain before the villain could kill his dad.

10 Rules of Musical Reality shows

1) The contestant has dedicated his/her life for music only. There is nothing more important in life for the contestant than music.

2) The contestant has been singing songs even before starting to speak. The dreams of the contestant, contestant's parents and grandparents are the same.

3) The contestant is a die-hard fan of all the judges of the show.

4) If the contestant did not sing the song well or forgets the lyrics of the song, it is either because he/she had high fever or he/she was thinking about a family problem when performing.

5) Irrespective of who comes to the "Danger Zone", the judges are always shocked, and disappointed with the public for voting less for those in the danger zone. Some even threaten to "quit" the show. But after assuring that none of the contestants will be eliminated, they unquit the show.

6) When there are 2 contestants in the danger zone, the one who does not get eliminated cries more than the one who gets eliminated. He/she will also plead with the judges to have him/her eliminated instead of the other person, but in vain.

7) "You are a winner", "Your future is bright. You are the superstar of the future" "God bless you"- These are some of the comments the eliminated contestant will receive. The episode will end with "Kabhi Alvida na kehna" or "Enaagali mundhe saagu nee" for a Hindi show and a Kannada show respectively. The eliminated contestant will also get a "standing ovation" as consolation.

8) The contestants have to appeal for votes from public, after explaining their family problems. The public has to send millions of votes to save their "favourite" contestant, who, by default will be of their own region. However, the judges may overrule the decision of the public, and not eliminate anybody from the show, thus making all those millions of votes (public money) go in vain.

9) There has to be atleast one wild card entry to bring the losers back to the show.

10) The special guest for the Grand Finale will be a bollywood superstar whose movie is about to release. You will forget the name of the "winner" of the show in a few months.

10 Rules of Daily soaps

1) If there are n number of good characters, there will be 3n number of negative characters.

2) The good ones will always be crying, either because of joy or sorrow, mostly because of sorrow. The bad ones keep sniggering when the good ones are hurt.

3) Irrespective of the character being good or bad, he/she will always tell lies. The bad ones lie to cause harm to the good ones, and the good ones lie so that their loved ones are not hurt.

4) The "very good" characters of the serial will cross all limits of sacrifice to bring "happiness" to their family.

5) The answer to the question "Kya baat hai? Tum kuch pareshan lag rahe ho" shall always be "Kuch nahi. Aisi koi baat nahi"

6) When a good character is deeply hurt, and feels that there is nothing left in life, the well-wisher will always utter the words "Sab theek ho jaayega"

7) The servants are to be considered as family members, and if something is missing in the house, nobody has to suspect the servants, because they are innocent.

8) There will be atleast 4 generations living in the house.

9) The "acche sanskaar" will be promptly passed on from one generation to the other.

10) The good characters in the serial will always be mistaken to be bad. But in one fine episode, it will be made known to everyone that the good person is actually a good person. And also, the bad intent of the bad person will be brought into light. But, the good person will forgive the bad ones, and also make sure that the bad person is not punished or thrown out of the house. This will encourage the bad ones to play some more games with the good ones. And the good ones blame God for all this.

Government work

If you are one who keeps cribbing about Government work not being done properly, do you know whom to blame?

You have to blame God for it.
Confused? Just visit Vidhana Soudha (in Bengaluru), and you can see a big disclaimer right at the top of Vidhana Soudha, which says:

GOVERNMENT WORK IS GOD'S WORK

So, let God do the work, and we'll relax ;)

Nice to see you after a long time!

Well, this expression is very suspicious, as far as I am concerned.

What is the nice thing?

That you are "seeing" that person after a long time

Or that you are seeing that person after a "long" time?

Is somebody saying "Nice to see your blog after a long time"? hahahaha

How is married life?

This is one question which has been "haunting" me ever since I got married. The first thing that every person on my gtalk and yahoo IM friends list would ask is "How is married life?" I got so much irritated of answering to the same question, so many times, and many times to the same persons, that I put it as my status message on my IM. (FAQ: How is married life? Ans: going well).

Then, after a few days, came the next question - "Any good news?"

I contributed to the development of my country's politicians

I voted.

Mujhko bhi to lift karaa de

In the movie "Yaarana", Amitabh Bacchan comes to city from village for the first time, and sees a strange thing called "a lift" in one office. He sees two young ladies enter the lift, and when the lift reopens, two older women come out of the lift. So, he feels this machine would make any person grow older, and denies to enter the lift.
I'm sure anyone who would watch the above scene would burst out laughing. But there are a few funnier characters in my office who behave indifferently when they are near/inside a lift.

1) Impatient types - These people walk in dandi march fashion towards the lift, as though they have to reach the terrace, where their personal copter is waiting to pick them up. When they enter the lift arena, they press all the buttons, doesnt matter if its pointing up or down. And when the lift doesnt open after 4 seconds, they keep pressing the pressed button until the lift opens. When the lift is about to open, their nose is almost touching the vertical bisectional line of the lift. And when the lift opens, they barge into the lift without even caring that some people are trying to get out of the lift. And after entering the lift, they realize the lift is going down while they wanted to go up. So, just before the lift closes, they come out of the lift cursing it.

2) Lethargic types - These people will be lost in their own world. They just stand in front of the lift door, without even bothering to press the button for the lift to come. They keep staring at the lift until it opens. When the lift opens, they just walk inside the lift as though they are sleep walking. After entering the lift, they choose to stand right in front of the lift buttons, making sure none of the buttons are visible to others standing in the lift. Sometimes, they rest their forehead on the place above the lift buttons, and stay in that position while the lift has gone from ground floor to 5th floor and come back to ground floor.

3) Busy types - Typically the so-called Managers, with their laptop attached with the adapter in one hand, the laptop being partly open making it look like a harmonium, and a stylish mobile phone in the other hand. They enter the lift with these gizmos, and their hands are so occupied that someone else has to press their floor button. And they keep screaming in the mobile, "Yes, I'm inside the lift, Im in ground floor, I just reached first floor, I'm in between 1st and 2nd floors, Hello ......... Hellllllooooo ......... Helloooooooooooooooooooooooo ... Damn the network". Finally, they get out of the lift, still on phone saying "Sorry, there was no network inside the lift. I can see you now"

4) Sporty types - After playing (read as "insulting") tennis for 90 mins, they are exhausted, and hence need a lift to go from ground floor to 2nd floor. Their bag is so huge that after they enter the lift, there is only 20% of free space available in the lift. Needless to say the aroma which the other people in the lift can enjoy, created thanks to the sweat glands of the Agassis.

5) chaiwaalas - These people will have a burger in one hand, and a hot cup of chai in the other. They will enter a crowded lift, so that the burger is millimeters away from the mouth of the person standing to the right and the hot chai can fall anytime on the person standing to the left.

What is your type?

Needless to say

This is another phrase I do not understand. If you actually see the usage, it is something like "Needless to say, he is a nice guy". If it is needless to say, then why are you saying it?

Another such expression is "He needs no introduction". And the speaker keeps talking for half an hour about the person, who needed no introduction.

Needless to say, these are useless expressions in the English language.

Had your lunch?

This is one question that annoys me a lot.

What do u mean by "Had "your" lunch?" I feel that the person who is asking me this question feels I steal someone else's lunch and have it everyday. Why can't people just ask "Had lunch?"

Another such question is "Your good name, please?" Even before knowing what it is, you are using such a nice adjective against it. You cheat!

There are other such idiotic questions and phrases which I can not recollect right now, because I'm hungry. So, I'll go and have "my" lunch.

Supernatural Powers

Whenever I used to watch a horror movie, I used to laugh, and make fun of those movies. i always believed that nothing like ghosts, super natural powers really exist in this world. I used to behave like the hero of any typical horror movie before interval.

But a few instances in my life made me change my thought about these things.

I started believing in super natural powers while watching the movies Yuvvrajj, Chandni Chowk to China and Delhi-6. I know none of these are horror movies, but while I was watching these movies on DVD, my arm moved by itself, went towards the DVD player, and pressed the "Eject" button, and the same arm then went near my forehead and started banging it.

Now, I know that some external forces do exist along with us.

And I know they are reading this blog as well!

Cycle Repair Shop

There is an "emotional" ad which comes on TV these days, asking us to save petrol.

Here's my version of the same:
Father and son in a car waiting for the signal to turn green.
Son sees that none of the vehicles are truned off even in the traffic signal.
Son suddenly says, "Cycle Repair Shop"
Father does not understand.
Son continues: "Maine soch liya hai. Jab main bada hounga, tab main cycle repair ki dukaan kholunga"
Father: "Kya?? Kyun??"
Son: "Jiss thara aap sab petrol waste kar rahe hain, future mein tho petrol bachega nahi. Tab tho sab cycle hi chalayenge na"
(*** THE TWIST ***)
Father smiles and stays quite.
Son: "Paapa, mere itna bolne ke baad bhi aapne car off nahi kiya"
Father: "Bete, agar main car off kar doonga, tho tumhe bada hoke petrol pump pe kaam karna padega. Isse accha hai ki tum khud ki cycle repair ki dukaan khol lo"

Blog Intro

Hi Guest,

Let me introduce you to my blog.

Guest, this is my blog. Blog, this is my guest.

Well, I dont want to write things about myself over here, because I dont want this blog to look like my autobiography.

I would be just putting accross some random thoughts. Hope you people enjoy reading them.

Yours truly!