Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Mujhko bhi to lift karaa de

In the movie "Yaarana", Amitabh Bacchan comes to city from village for the first time, and sees a strange thing called "a lift" in one office. He sees two young ladies enter the lift, and when the lift reopens, two older women come out of the lift. So, he feels this machine would make any person grow older, and denies to enter the lift.
I'm sure anyone who would watch the above scene would burst out laughing. But there are a few funnier characters in my office who behave indifferently when they are near/inside a lift.

1) Impatient types - These people walk in dandi march fashion towards the lift, as though they have to reach the terrace, where their personal copter is waiting to pick them up. When they enter the lift arena, they press all the buttons, doesnt matter if its pointing up or down. And when the lift doesnt open after 4 seconds, they keep pressing the pressed button until the lift opens. When the lift is about to open, their nose is almost touching the vertical bisectional line of the lift. And when the lift opens, they barge into the lift without even caring that some people are trying to get out of the lift. And after entering the lift, they realize the lift is going down while they wanted to go up. So, just before the lift closes, they come out of the lift cursing it.

2) Lethargic types - These people will be lost in their own world. They just stand in front of the lift door, without even bothering to press the button for the lift to come. They keep staring at the lift until it opens. When the lift opens, they just walk inside the lift as though they are sleep walking. After entering the lift, they choose to stand right in front of the lift buttons, making sure none of the buttons are visible to others standing in the lift. Sometimes, they rest their forehead on the place above the lift buttons, and stay in that position while the lift has gone from ground floor to 5th floor and come back to ground floor.

3) Busy types - Typically the so-called Managers, with their laptop attached with the adapter in one hand, the laptop being partly open making it look like a harmonium, and a stylish mobile phone in the other hand. They enter the lift with these gizmos, and their hands are so occupied that someone else has to press their floor button. And they keep screaming in the mobile, "Yes, I'm inside the lift, Im in ground floor, I just reached first floor, I'm in between 1st and 2nd floors, Hello ......... Hellllllooooo ......... Helloooooooooooooooooooooooo ... Damn the network". Finally, they get out of the lift, still on phone saying "Sorry, there was no network inside the lift. I can see you now"

4) Sporty types - After playing (read as "insulting") tennis for 90 mins, they are exhausted, and hence need a lift to go from ground floor to 2nd floor. Their bag is so huge that after they enter the lift, there is only 20% of free space available in the lift. Needless to say the aroma which the other people in the lift can enjoy, created thanks to the sweat glands of the Agassis.

5) chaiwaalas - These people will have a burger in one hand, and a hot cup of chai in the other. They will enter a crowded lift, so that the burger is millimeters away from the mouth of the person standing to the right and the hot chai can fall anytime on the person standing to the left.

What is your type?

3 comments:

  1. Fantastic as always. Man you should be a standup comedian...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nice .. Type 2. LOL... Keep posting...

    ReplyDelete
  3. superb observations. I have observed another character called attackers.. they press close button before someone tries to enter the lift (they curse the lazy lift ). and the outsider tries to unclose either by pressing the button from outside.. or entering into with strong faith on the sensors (if dare enough)..

    ReplyDelete